Quicksand: A Mother’s Love

No amount of books or upbringing can really prepare you for the reality of being a parent. Especially when you are the parent of a child with special needs. I don’t advertise this about our family often, because my first response is to live constantly in the moment with it, to face it daily with whatever strength I have left in me, instead of dwelling or sharing it with the world.

For me, personally, it can be so painfully endearing, because there is so much fear and worry, and so much unconditional and unexpected Love that grows directly from all of it. But I have to say – even if both of my children were 100% typical, I would still feel these words to their very core.

Parenting is SO hard. This poem is for every parent, everywhere, who’s ever felt powerless to the constant loop of fear and Love that keeps us fighting for our children and their future, daily.

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Coming up for air

In a pit of quicksand

Who I’m supposed to be

Is not always who I am

And by that, I mean

I am, what you’ve made me

Though I have made you

My fight is your freedom

To think, Love, and choose

Mother’s Love, unconditional

With you, the condition

Without you, I’d wither and wane

And beg, for my return to

That purest form of Love

Which comes at the cost of

A lifelong chain

of dry-mouthed gasps

And futile grasps

As I emerge then submerge

Forever embraced

In an infinite pit

of relentless sand

and boundless Love

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P.S. If no one has told you, your best IS good enough today, and you are doing a phenomenal job. (oh….and I Love you!)